They Don’t Build and They Don’t Grow Because Emotional Addiction Becomes Their Only Identity
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A woman once told me that she told her narcissistic boyfriend that he “wasn’t living properly,” and for some reason or another, that has always stuck with me.
I think I can’t forget it because it sums up in a sentence what we find both off-putting and fascinating about them.
The way that they are much like vampires in the sense that they present the illusion of life, without any of the traits or activities that constitute “living.”
This is because their brain’s reward system has been completely hijacked by emotional addiction and the quest for validation.
Now, the narcissist only preoccupies themselves with the addiction cycle that they repeat with everyone they know to some degree.
They only live for the high/love bombing phase, as this is the part that makes them feel good.
Therefore, everything they do, good or bad, is in pursuit of satisfying their addiction.
They don’t commit to anything else because their brain has rewired itself to only prioritise getting a fix.
What is it that gets them high?
It isn’t you per se, or whoever they are dealing with that they get high on; it is all about how that person makes them feel.
Remember that a narcissist’s childhood taught them that: Chaos = Love
This means that in their emotionally regressed state, they are that infant again, and they will seek out turbulent and disruptive ways to create chaos with you where there was none, just so that they can feel “loved.”
This addiction is all-consuming, and it leads to a completely wasted life, where very little is accomplished, save for the complete destruction of the nervous systems of everyone around them.
© Honor Payne